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"Hey, baby, are you going to sit on my lap?" Santa wiggled his brows at me.

 

Killian's charm didn't work on me. It never had. Or that's what I told myself.

 

"You can tell me what you want for Christmas." His dark hair curled out from under his velvet hat; his voice grew lower, more insistent.

 

All night, the line of children to see Santa was steady, blocking any interactions between us. Where were the kids clamoring to sit on Santa's lap now?

 

"I doubt there will be any more kids." Killian shoved the sleeve of his jacket up, revealing an expensive looking watch. It probably cost more than the rent for my apartment for an entire year.

 

I grabbed the basket of candy canes from the floor next to his chair. I was tired of playing elf to his Santa. "We should clean up."

 

"I don't think so." Killian snagged my wrist, tugging me until I fell into his lap. His arms banded around me.

 

I was perched precariously on his thigh. His very strong, well-muscled thigh. He'd filled out since he was eighteen. Not that I'd ever sat on his lap before. I was positive it was the combination of workouts and long days on the slopes.

 

He pulled me in closer so that my face was close to his, his voice rumbling through my body. "That's better. Now, what do you want for Christmas?"

 

My jaw tightened, old feelings swirling in my chest I wanted to ignore. "For you to let me go."

 

He chuckled. "Surely, a beautiful woman such as yourself has lots of things she wants."

 

Sure, my family's home needed repairs, my siblings required money for school activities and sports, and my mom had an endless stream of doctor's bills in her elusive search for pain relief. Everything got more expensive every year. But what did I want?

 

His forehead wrinkled. "Don't tell me you don't know."

 

I was sure it was hard to believe after watching each child excitedly climb into Santa's lap and list the myriad of items they wanted for Christmas, ranging from video game consoles to dolls to games. "I don't need anything. Can you let me up now?"

 

He grinned. "Not until you tell me what you want."

 

I thought about what I needed to do when I got home tonight. Check my work emails, shower, and go to bed, because I rose early to make donuts for a deli in town.

 

My body ached from the thought of how little sleep I was getting each day, and there still wasn't enough time in the day to get everything done. I needed my businesses to generate more money so I could support my family. "Can you duplicate me?"

 

The crease in his forehead deepened. "Duplicate you?"

 

"Can you make more of me, so that I can get everything done?" I took advantage of him loosening his hold to slip off his thigh.

 

He quickly readjusted his arms so that I stood between his legs. He was tall enough that we were almost face-to-face in this position.

 

"I don't know. Have you been good this year?" The question was one I'd heard all night, but it took on a sensual tone when he delivered it to me.

 

My entire body flushed with heat. "I've been a good girl."

 

He raised a brow. "How do I know if you're telling the truth? You look like you've been bad. Very, very bad."

 

I rolled my eyes. "I thought you were supposed to be all knowing."

 

"I think we both know that's not true." His Santa facade slipped slightly to reveal the man behind the beard.

 

I wrinkled my nose, pretending this entire interaction was distasteful, when in reality, he had my nerves running hot. "This is ridiculous."

 

Killian hummed. "I don't come home often, but when I do, you don't want to talk to me. It's almost as if you're avoiding me."

 

I'd crushed on him all through high school while he dated one cheerleader after another. I didn't think he saw me until one night we were alone on one of the slopes above the town, talking about our hopes and dreams. I was excited about the full scholarship I'd been offered to the University of Colorado to be on their snowboarding team.

​

Killian had been vulnerable that night. His usual confident demeanor nowhere to be found. He'd admitted that he wanted to go to college to escape his family. I'd been shocked because to me, the Wildes were perfect. A big happy family that never had to worry about money. He didn't need a scholarship to go to college. He could go wherever he wanted. When he turned toward me, my heart was so full of him, I couldn't resist kissing him.

 

Except he hadn't kissed me back. As soon as I realized he was stiff and unresponsive, I scrambled away from him, unable to meet his gaze, apologizing profusely. It was the single most humiliating moment of my life.

 

A few days later, when my mom's back gave out again, she'd told me she didn't think she could work anymore; I did what I had to do. I turned down the scholarship, got a job, and helped my family as much as I could. I had two younger siblings whose father had walked out on them years ago. Killian never sought me out, not that I expected him to.

 

I avoided him when he came home. I didn't want to confront the man I'd kissed. I'd ruined our easygoing friendship. He'd talked to me about things he didn't share with his many girlfriends. We had something special, and I'd ruined it. "It's better this way."

 

The line between his brows deepened. "What if I don't think so?"

 

I sighed as I remembered the pictures of him at races, the women that were never far from his arm. "I'm sure you're used to getting your way, but that's not going to happen with me."

 

His lips quirked. "And why is that?"

 

I chewed my lip. "I'm not like those other women."

 

He cocked a brow. "What other women?"

 

I was nothing like those women who tracked him on the race circuit. I had a family to take care of and money to make. I didn't have time to follow a man around the world, living his dreams. I was too busy building my own. "I have work to do."

 

This time when I made a move to escape, his arms loosened. I gathered the items we'd brought with us to the small building and turned off the light. My heart was pounding hard, and I had the sudden desire to run from this man who always made me feel too much. I'd acted on those feelings once, and it had blown up in my face. I wouldn't let him charm his way back into my life, only to embarrass myself when he reminded me he didn't feel the same.

 

Men like Killian Wilde didn't go for women like me. His life was too big. He was meant for greater things than his family's ski resort. Telluride would always be my home. It was where my family was and ultimately my heart.

 

Killian Wilde was a silly teenage crush. It would be foolish to harbor feelings for him after all these years.

 

***

 

A Few Weeks Later

 

I was supposed to be helping Addison host the charity event for foster-care kids. The cause was near and dear to her heart because she was a social worker, and her new boyfriend and Wilde cousin Walker's daughter, Dakota, had been in the system recently.

 

I was on edge, worried that something could go wrong, and that we wouldn't raise enough money. I was also avoiding Killian.

 

He was home with an injured knee, and his brothers had asked me to be his personal assistant. It was a good opportunity, especially since I was the one who'd pitched the idea for personal assistants for guests staying at the lodge.

 

If I could attach my name to his, it would boost my new business, and I needed the money. Between my various businesses—a donut maker, an event organizer, and a holiday decorator—I was struggling. Not one of them was bringing in steady income.

 

My family needed me, and I needed to come up with something that would make our lives easier.

 

I tried not to spend too much time thinking about how life could have been different if I'd followed my dreams and went to school on the athletic scholarship. That wasn't my reality.

 

I felt Killian's heated gaze on me as I moved around the room. I wasn't worried he'd tug me into his lap since he couldn't get up and cross the room easily on crutches.

 

He thrived on his reputation as being strong and athletic. And now he was injured, unable to perform the sport he loved. He was cranky and irritable.

 

Every time my mind drifted back to that day I sat on his lap, my body heated. What had he been playing at? Was he bored without his adoring fans? Was he playing with me because I'd kissed him so many years ago?

 

Ever since I'd kissed him, his light had shined brighter while I'd struggled to keep mine aflame. It flickered and threatened to go out, but I always rallied to keep it burning. No matter how low the light was, I kept moving. One of these business ventures had to be successful. My family deserved a break.

 

What I wouldn't give to be able to afford everything my family needed. What I wouldn't give for a little more sleep.

 

The caterer signaled for me from across the room, and I immediately moved without thinking about my path. My heart stuttered when Killian reached out and snagged my wrist. He pulled me close so that I was leaning down to hear his gruff voice.

 

"Where do you think you're going?"

 

"I'm working the event."

 

He kept a tight grip on my wrist, and I wondered if he'd pull me down to his lap like he had before. "Aren't you supposed to be my assistant?"

 

My heart pounded in my ears. "Apparently, your brothers think you need a babysitter."

 

Killian growled. "I don't."

​

I pulled my hand from his. "I couldn't agree more." But then my heart paused for a different reason. I needed the money. "But I agreed to help out, and it would be good for my new business."

 

"What business is that?"

 

"I'm starting a personal-assistant business at the resort. If a guest needs something, I'll provide it."

 

His eyes flashed with heat, and I was quick to add, "If they forgot a hairbrush or need a dress for an event, they can ask me for help."

 

"When will you be at my disposal?"

 

I sighed. "I have to handle this event, and then I'm all yours. Do you need something in the meantime?"

 

I hated to be at his beck and call, but that was literally the job, and I couldn't believe the amount of money he was willing to pay me. Apparently, it was the equivalent salary of his current personal assistant, Riley. I could use the money, so I'd suck up my pride and do whatever he needed.

 

The kids had teased me at school because my mom worked as a maid at the resort. It rankled that I was a servant for someone with more means than me, but hopefully one day, I'd be the boss and have people working for me. I just had to suck it up for now.

 

"I want to go back to my room."

 

I looked up as someone approached the podium. "Can you wait until after the speeches? I'm sure your cousin Walker will want you to be here for this."

 

Killian's eyes softened, and he nodded.

 

"As soon as he's done talking, I'll get you out of here."

 

"Thank you," Killian said so softly; I wasn't sure I'd heard him right.

 

After answering the caterer's questions, I moved to the back of the room. I wasn't a guest. I knew my place. I'd always be the one working the event.

 

I tried not to get down about my place in life, but I couldn't forget where I came from. To most people, I'd always be the maid's daughter. No matter how hard I worked, I wasn't sure I'd ever be able to shake that image and step into the successful business-owner role. Sometimes it felt like a role I played at instead of owned.

 

I focused on Walker's speech about meeting his daughter and his gratitude for the agency's assistance in making that happen. By the time he was finished talking, my eyes were stinging. I wondered how Killian felt, hearing that story.

 

Addison and Walker embraced, along with Dakota, while I crossed the room to Killian. The sooner I got him out of here, the sooner I could get back to my responsibilities.

 

I handed him the crutches, and he tucked them under his arms. He leaned his weight onto them as we slowly made our way across the room. The guests hovered around Walker and Addison and the donation table.

 

"No one will notice that we're leaving," Killian said simply when we were in the empty hallway outside the event room.

 

"I'm sure Walker and Addison are pleased you came." I wondered if he would have returned for the event if he hadn't been injured.

 

"Are you happy I'm home?" Killian asked.

 

The question was an odd one because we weren’t close. "I'm ambivalent."

 

"Ambivalent, huh?" Killian stumbled on the carpet, and I moved to wrap an arm around his back, holding him steady until he got a better grip on his crutches.

 

Right now, I was feeling anything but ambivalent. His body was hard, lined with muscles from his frequent runs down the mountain and his workout regimen. He clearly took care of himself.

 

When I moved away from him, my body hummed with desire from the proximity. I was hoping the silly teenage crush had dissipated with time, but it didn't seem like it had.

 

"I can make it to the elevator," Killian said gruffly, and I wondered if he was embarrassed that he needed this kind of assistance.

 

At the elevator, I waited while Killian leaned his weight on one arm and pushed the Up button with the other.

 

"What kind of assistance will you need while you're home?" I asked in my best professional voice. I could do this. I could keep my distance and not think about how much I was attracted to him.

 

The door popped open, and we stepped inside the empty space.

 

He cocked a brow as he leaned against the back wall and held the crutches in one hand. "What do my brothers want you to do?"

 

"They want me to ensure you attend your therapy sessions and eat healthy."

 

He shook his head. "You're a glorified babysitter."

 

"I'm here to give you whatever you need. I can run errands, make phone calls, and answer emails. I've never had a position like this before, so just let me know what you need, and I'll do it. I'm a hard worker."

 

Killian's eyes flashed with heat, and I wondered if he'd read something else into my offer. I had to remember he hadn't kissed me back. His lack of interest in me, couldn't have been clearer. I'd seen the women he spent time with on the circuit. I couldn't compete.

 

I'd never been allowed on the penthouse floor where the family reserved rooms. When I was a child, I'd always imagined it was extravagant, something way better than we could ever hope to experience.

 

I tried not to feel less than around Killian and his family, but it was hard not to. He had access to things that I could only dream of experiencing. He lived in a hotel, and I'd only ever cleaned one with my mother.

 

When the door opened, I waited for him to precede me, but he gestured for me to go first. The Wildes were gentlemen. I paused, waiting for him to show me which door was his for the duration of his stay.

 

He scanned his card in front of the last door on the left. When the light blinked green, he gestured for me to go first.

 

He stepped inside and winked. "I finally have you in my room."